full of whispers
devoid of words
dreams fled far away
traces through the desert persist
shared memories
but all the corners seem to be closer
and ever more scary -so empty
laugh! almost manage a smile
sleep comes and goes; still tired
Monday through and Wednesday waited
clothes washed, fabric bleached a blank white
hides the grey dust
the self tailored unique
no divergence from the model yesterday
but my shadows kiss
sun rises and night falls
a path, a saving brach, a spider's net
tiny specks, but no peroxide bleach
will touch the worlds conveyed
even as the spot dissolves the outer memory
their images and yours
tonight remain
a mirror glass in shards perhaps
and I numb myself for another day
selling out
I know where the rope hangs
better catch me falling
than let me go on without stumbling
//pointless perhaps but pointing to?
2 comments:
Why don't leave out the //comment at the end of each of your posts if all it says is that the text above is nonsense/pointless/tobecontinuedanotherday?
(Even though they're java ;D )
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No comment on the content at this point.
Again a very restless one of it's kind. Some verses I find a little long, in some places I would have cut the line and rearranged the words so as to make the poem more clear.
You know well that's my usual type of comment. My intention is not to make you change the thing (I know you won't and I know I don't want you to) but to make you think about my remark.
I accept the facts, but I do so screaming and kicking, hahaha!
My comments are only there for the sake of symmetry. I admit a little too vain a habbit. Maybe I'll manage to drop it some day.
And as to changes... I wrote the whole thing a day (night) earlier than I uploaded it. I contemplated a few changes, but somehow they conflicted with the creation of the poem... A whole rewrite would have been the best option to make the poem work - luckily a measure too sacrilegious and difficult to be available.
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